Monday, September 24, 2007

The Wheel In The Sky Keeps On Turning.

"Oh, the wheel in the sky keeps on turning Ooh,
I don’t know where I’ll be tomorrow
Wheel in the sky keeps me yearning Ooh,
I don’t know, I don’t know
Oh, the wheel in the sky keeps on turning Ooh,
I don’t know where I’ll be tomorrow"

Every morning, the alarm clock rings
and it's time to get up and get on with a new day.
To continue on among the world of the living.
Each day it becomes a little easier.
Traction slips every once in a while.

Multiple things can be true at once.
I miss Sheyn.
It still hurts.
Still seems surreal.
His cell phone is disconnected but
I still don't have the heart to erase his number from my phone.
It seems so terminal.
Like a betrayal.
My little brother is gone,
but I know God's mercy was in it.

We had Sheyn for 23 years after having been diagnosed with a multiform high grade astrocytoma.
We were gifted with having him for that many years.

Even though his cancerous kidney was removed, the cancer had metastasized to stage 4 in his lungs.
His other kidney was failing.
Sheyn had a long, arduous battle ahead of him.
A battle that had a very poor prognosis.
No one wants to die slowly and painfully.
Sheyn was no different.

He died quickly, really.


Sheyn died on the afternoon of Sunday September 9th.
His memorial service was Thursday the 13th.
(One month after his 36th Birthday)
His funeral was Friday the 14th of September.
There were between 250-300 people at his memorial service.
I knew Sheyn had friends.
I had no idea just how many and how many
loved him so much.


Sheyn was a regular face in the Omaha music scene.
He didn't play, didn't sing and didn’t write music or lyrics.
Sheyn supported his many friends who were the
"Stars of the hour"
They came to look for his smiling face in the crowd enjoying their music as they played.
Over and over again, the many bands members came up to us and told of us of their affections for Sheyn.
It was like a tape recorder.
"We loved Sheyn. He was the most kind, caring, loyal, supportive, gentle person I've ever known."
"Now his chair is going to be empty"

Rough looking tattooed hard ass heavy metal musicians
were weeping.
Mourning THEIR loss of Sheyn.
Lingering past the allotted time for the memorial service, reluctant to leave him.
Perhaps in hopes that he would rise from his casket in a "Gotcha" of some morose joke.
Maybe a vain attempt of not wanting to let him go.
Sheyn, now gone, was "The Star of the Hour"


My family said his final days were foretelling in hind site.
The last two weeks of his life he was feeling progressively worse,
but family and friends all said that, "He looked better than he has in years."
Many said that he "Absolutely Glowed"
Two days before he died my brother was so weak that he couldn't leave the house
and told my mother that he knew he didn't have much time left.
The day before he died, although he was feeling terrible.
My sister and my mother were struck by, "How beautiful he looked"
The morning of the day he died my sister said that
he walked by her and she thought, "He looked so beautiful it took my breath away
and I had to do a double take. He was so handsome I couldn't even speak"

He was dead just a few short hours later.
The hand of The Lord was upon him.
His presence so near as he prepared to receive him that
God's glory was shining upon Sheyn.
Family and friends saw this


Sheyn was a witness to many.
His friends said, "Sheyn told me all the time that Jesus was the only one worth trusting"

When we sorted through his things he had so many witnessing tracts.
Books on how to witness to other religions.
Books on prophecy.

The testimony of his humble, unassuming gentle witness
was evidenced by the vast variance
of people at both services.
Atheists, agnostics, Hindu, black, white, Asian, Hispanic, Protestants, Catholics...
All deeply grieving.
All deeply touched.
All brought together to hear the final testimony of his life.
To hear the Gospel's message of salvation proclaimed on Sheyn's behalf.
Many who would not voluntarily step into a church sat in a mortuary eagerly listening to the minister share why Sheyn was the way he was.
Because Sheyn, reflected Jesus, in everything he did more than anyone I ever knew.
Because of Sheyn's life, Sheyn's death was a mechanism to bring others into the Kingdom of Jesus Christ.


The day after his funeral.
My sister happened upon one of Sheyn's books.
A book of subject that was a particular fascination of Sheyn's.
A book on Biblical prophecy.
My sister said that she felt God tell her to turn to page 40.
Between pages 39 and 40 was our father's obituary.
She heard God say to her, "Sheyn is with your dad in heaven."
Because of long seeded hurt and bitterness towards our father, only God could have said this to her.


Stepping back from it all.
The pieces all fit.
The picture all forms a picture giving evidence that the timing
was within God's perfect design.
Sheyn is reveling in God's glory.
He's smiling down on us, having the time of his life in a perfect body.
He wouldn't want to return if given a chance.
Who would?
We can still hurt.
We can still grieve our loss of such a beautiful, wonderful man we all took for granted.
But we can still rejoice that in all of this, Jesus is glorified.
And Sheyn is pretty pleased with how all 36 years
and 27 days of his life turned out.

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